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volatilevibes:

Okay so, where I live (Canada, Newfoundland) we have the smallest ponies.
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And the biggest dogs
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Here’s a size comparison for the Newfoundland dog 
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and together
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That is a full grown dog and pony together LOOK AT THAT!
Now if you don’t think that’s the greatest shit ever I don’t know what is!

Is he walking the pony?!

jasoncodd:

batty4u:

plans for today fell through

got dolled up and shaved my legs for nothing

sighs

NOT FOR NOTHING.  Now you can touch your own legs and go “mmm smooooooth.”

Also selfies.

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"Remember who loved you no matter how fucked up in the head you were."
-Me. (via dark0tic)

ixnay-on-the-oddk:

My idea of flirting is making fun of each other until one of us fucks up and says something nice.

colornbian:

How do you become someone who puts stickers on fruit because I think I could do that

Anonymous: when was the last time u an someone u like talked?

Yesterday

Anonymous: My assumption: you don't currently like anyone?

Both true and false..

cokeflow:

“I’m on my way!” I say as I remain naked in bed

sleezed:

i’ll finger fuck you under the table at a restaurant then lick my fingers when I’m done I don’t give a fuck

wailtothethief:

Fuck I’m walking downtown and I pass a group of guys staring at me and I think “great catcall time” but then one guy goes “you look like you could kill a man a million different ways with just your bare hands”. This. This is an acceptable comment to give a girl on the street.